This Mask I Wear

Pretending all is well.

All is sane.

That is the mask I wear.

The mask of loneliness.

The mask of lies thus told.

The mask of meaningless smiles.

I could say its all okay.

Just having a bad day.

But my lips would whisper

just like any other.

Never fully trusting another.

Never surely knowing what's

behind the corner.

A connection is being yearned.

So far from my grasp.

To be one with another,

To know I'm the only one.

I feel out of place.

Out of mind.

Am I so different?

Am I so lost?

Is it really me?

Or the faces in my

Reality? Should I

Let it go?

It would be easier.

It would be quicker.

Pretending I'm not all

alone. Pretending its

Just a dream.

I can pinch my arm,

I can scrap my knee.

But nothing ever 

wakes  me from such

a terrible dream.

It's been said.

It's been done.

I lay in the darkness

with streams on my cheeks.

Violens make the quiet

just a little more colourful.

Something will always be

missing. The feeling of

Belonging. The feeling

that all is well.